The Three C's!

November 5-11, 2012

What a great week.  We love feeling that we still are connected with all we love.  We appreciate Skype and Face Time that allow us to stay in touch with our family.  It is amazing that we can talk and see our family even though we are so far away.  How blessed we are.  At the same time, we appreciate the emails no matter how long from so many of you.  We draw strength and are lifted as we think about those that have had such an influence in our lives.  This week we received a short email from Alan Chadwick.  We appreciate the friendship of Alan, Denise, and their family.  They have been home teachers, and in this week we felt like we received a wonderful home teaching message intended specifically for us.  Alan said, “I think doing your type of work would take a lot of patience and diligence! Keep up the great work! I remember when I was a missionary in the Philippines, I would get frustrated with things and kept comparing things there with how they were here in the USA. Then one day, Elder Jacob De Jager who was the area authority at the time, came by and gave us one of his 'chalk talks' he said ‘remember the three C's, don't compare, don't complain, and don't criticize.’”

We hope that we don’t come across that we are complaining or criticizing our circumstances here in the Congo although, we are guilty.  As we talked about these three C’s, we realize that it is very difficult not to compare how very blessed our life is back in the comforts of our home, or even comparing this mission to our mission on Temple Square.  We talked about how easy it is to get frustrated and discouraged and complain a little even if it is just in our minds.  We recognize how easy it is to feel the weight that comes with realizing the enormous potential of PEF and knowing how small and simple we are.  With those realities and thanks to the wonderful message from the Chadwicks, we will attempt to modify our reaction to commend, compliment, and cherish.  We want you to know how blessed we are to be here in Africa at this particular time.  It is hard not to talk about things here that are different from our normal experiences because we are captivated by them.  We are especially overwhelmed by the strength, courage, and happiness of the people here. 

We have been impressed with how courteous everyone is here.  They will always shake your hand if you extend yours.  If you don’t extend your hand, they will cup one hand around the other fist and bring it to their chest in a very touching gesture as they dip the head.  I wish I could emulate it but so far it doesn’t come naturally.

We are impressed with the dedication and commitment of the members.  We told you about the first family history training meeting for three bishoprics last week.  We commented about the fact that one more person came than had been invited.  Again yesterday in the second training meeting for three more bishoprics, the room was packed.  Full bishoprics came, many from long distances.  I asked one bishopric how long it took them to come.  They said they left at 8:00 am to be there by 10:00.  Almost all of them have to come by transport (the Congo form of taxi or bus) because they don’t have cars.  They came to be trained and to get hands on experience so they can go back into their wards and get everyone excited about researching and submitting their families to the temple, and to prepare for the coming temple.  It is inspiring to feel their enthusiasm as they are able to get into New Family Search and enter the names of their loved ones.  We challenge all of you back in Star Valley that you too commit yourselves to prepare for the temple in the same way we see it happening here.

As we talk of devotion, we want to reiterate that when Elder Holland was here, each of the stakes held special meetings.  Elder Holland was able to attend only one.  Elder and Sister Clayton attended another.  Elder and Sister Renlund attended one, and Elder Mbaya attended one.  As expected, there were many who attended the meeting with Elder Holland, but Elder and Sister Moon attended the stake where Elder Mbaya presided.  They said that in that stake there are 4,100 members and there were 3,900 in attendance.  Where else can you find 95% attendance at a conference?

We have been told that a vice president from LDS business college is here this week to review what is happening and to move the construction program taught by Elder Billings forward so the program can continue with proper accreditation even after he is through.  At the same time, they are hoping to expand into other developing countries, and a woman came who has helped in writing the manual used in this program and who will be writing the manual that will be used as the construction program is expanded into other countries.  We have the impression that she is trying to get first hand exposure to the circumstances, both good and difficult, impacting such a program in developing countries with such poverty.

We want to mention that our two volunteers who help us at the PEF Center are both starting their school with the help of a PEF loan.  We can feel their excitement, but it means that they will not be able to spend as much time helping us.  We have asked another PEF student, Daddy, to help us.  It is amazing how much we rely on them and how much they do. 

Another PEF student who has just completed the construction program and who is just an amazing person, learned that he has been selected as one of only 7 from all of Africa to attend BYU Hawaii on scholarship.  He is so kind and personable.  We just loved him from the moment we met him.  .  It is a significant work/study scholarship but requires a sponsor who can assure that non-covered costs can be covered.  Through people here and in Hawaii, a sponsor was found.  The program requires that he return to his country to work after completion of his degree.  This is a tremendous opportunity and honor, but has its challenges.  He is not married, but has a girlfriend.  He says they will probably have to long distance relationship for four plus years.  Despite the challenges, he is excited and we are excited for him.

Just yesterday, another student was excited to share that he is going to get married.  He also let me see the agreement that he and his fiancée’s parents have signed.  The agreement is for the “dot” (pronounced with a long O) or dowry that he has to pay before they can be married.  He explained that it is a continuing tradition in many of the tribes of Africa.  The agreement itemizes things for the father and things for the mother. 

 

For the father, Céderic will pay $500, furnish a suit and other items of clothing, some animals, and other things I don’t remember.  He also will provide clothing, jewelry, animals, and other items to the mother.  In all, it will cost him about $1,200.  He said this will be very difficult because he only makes $200 per month right now, but he is going to economize and try to find additional work so they can be married in the temple next May or June.  We understand that the church is trying to discourage the dot, but many times extended family receives some of the consideration, and when they are not members, it becomes difficult.

Friday, we were blessed with one of those experiences that you hope for as a missionary.  We had finished a hard day at the PEF Center and were anxious to get home.  We got into the truck and headed to the gate out of the church grounds.  I would mention that most businesses, schools, churches are gated and have security guards.  Our church is gated and has a little hut at the gate where the guards are.  The guard motioned to us like he wanted to ask a question.  We stopped and unrolled the window. He greeted us and said that he has been working there for a week now.  He wanted to know how to become “believing” in our church.  He didn’t say he wanted  to become a member or be baptized.  He seemed to be searching for the right word and ask how to become “believing” in our church.  I asked him if he had ever talked to the missionaries and he said no.  I indicated that sometimes the missionaries came to the church and taught people, but he said he lived quite far.  He said that there was a church close to where he lived, and I took that to mean there was a ward chapel in his neighborhood, but maybe he just meant a church nearby.  Anyway, we didn’t want to miss the opportunity so I asked if he would write his name and phone number down so we could have the missionaries call him and set up a time to visit with him.  He liked the idea and gave us his name and phone number.  His name is Erick Sangwa.  I like simple names like Erick.  We have turned his name and number in and hope to find out how things go.

There are a number of women, probably 4 or 5, who have been given permission to work the ground that is not currently used by the church.  I don’t know exactly what they grow and harvest, but it is obvious that they have nothing.  I asked one of our young men if they are members and if they live there because they seem to be there every day except Sunday.  He said he thought they were members,  but they might not all be members, and he said that he doesn’t know where they live but he doesn’t think they live there.  At first, we probably just stared at them, but then we started waving at each other, and now they will wave and shout “bonjour” every morning as we arrive to start our day.  What a buoying experience it is each morning.  This photo shows one of the women under the tree.

This week I was able to go with Pitshou from the Employment Resource Center to visit several schools where we have some problems we are trying to resolve.  I wish I could take a camera just to be able to show what the schools are like, but I don’t feel that it is appropriate.  I like Pitshou.  We normally work with Russel who is the director of Employment Resource Services,  but he is in Lumbumbashi.  I assumed the Pitshou would take the lead because he is familiar with the schools and how they work.  He drove which I appreciate, and he made sure we found the administrative offices and the people we needed to visit, but would let me enter first and present our problem or concern.  Although I wasn’t the most comfortable doing it, it was good to be forced into something new, and everyone was receptive in trying to find an agreeable solution.

On Monday, we were taken to visit the police to complete certain paperwork and get finger printed to get out permanent visa.  We had been warned about the experience but it went very quickly and easily for us.  We think it was because so much is done outside and in little offices that have no doors or windows and it was obvious that a rain was approaching.  We finished just as it started raining.  I asked if we could take a picture of the finger printing.  President Thierry works in the mission office and he helps with all these matters.  He seems to know and get along with everybody.  We were so happy that he is there to help us.

 As we drove out, we took this picture to show the finger printing table on the right and the washing area where we washed ink off our hands on the left.

We want to wish our granddaughter, Carley, a very happy birthday on Wednesday.  We are so proud of you and hope your day is special.